Relationships are hard. They require constant work and attention.
Relationships are incredibly rewarding when they are working well. They are a challenge, at best, when they are not.
Finding a good, healthy relationship means you’re going to have to kiss a lot of frogs in order to find your prince. Inevitably, this means there are going to be breakups, and you may find yourself asking ‘Will he miss me when I’m gone?’
There are a few signs he misses you after a breakup, as well as things you can do to increase the chances of him missing you.
In this post, we’re going to dive into all of the above, as well as why it isn’t necessarily a good idea to try to make someone miss you.
Does He Miss Me? Signs He Misses You After a Breakup
All too often in a breakup, there is an imbalance, where one partner wants out more than the other.
This can be difficult to cope with, especially if you have the kind of on-off relationship where you keep breaking up and then getting back together.
If you really want to end it for good, then the best way is to just pull the band aid off in one go and call it a day. This may be difficult but it’s not as hard as the back-and-forth that happens when one, or both of you can’t seem to let go.
Will he miss me if I leave him alone?
Missing each other is a natural feeling when you are no longer together, even if the relationship has run its course.
However, most of what you miss is the familiarity of the relationship, rather than the person themselves.
Think about it – this is someone you spoke to every day, shared your thoughts, your hopes, your stresses, and once they are gone, it leaves a gap.
You can think of it like getting a tooth pulled, or removing a couch from your home. You keep looking for it at first, but you soon get used to the empty space where they used to be.
However, if he keeps initiating contact after the first few weeks, it may be a sign that he genuinely misses YOU rather than just the relationship.
Signs he misses you after a breakup
He watches your social media
Many people will block their exes on social media or other ways of communication. This can help both parties move on quicker, without the constant reminder that they are out there, living their best lives.
However, if your ex is always watching your stories and finding ways to communicate with you, then yes, they clearly miss you. As we said earlier, it’s natural that you will both miss each other.
The question you need to ask yourself is why they want to keep in touch. Often, when long-term relationships end, it’s the comfort and the familiarity that they miss, not necessarily you.
Sure, they may still send you funny memes or react to your stories, but that doesn’t mean that they actively want to get back together.
As the saying goes, old habits die hard.
These types of situations are kind of like ‘the devil you know’. It seems easier to continue on with a relationship that doesn’t really work than to have to put in the work needed to start a new one.
He starts showing up everywhere
A major sign that he misses you after a breakup is that he’ll start showing up at your regular haunts, such as your favourite bar or the park where he knows you like to walk your dog. He might even show up to your workplace with flowers!
He might also be in contact with your friends, trying to get them to put in a good word for him.
All of these are certainly signs he misses you, but this type of behaviour can also be a big red flag. It’s one thing to ‘accidentally’ bump into someone (we’ve all done it), but be careful that it doesn’t turn into an obsession.
You’re not questioning it!
I’m going to be very blunt – if you’re asking the internet ‘does he miss me?’ chances are, he doesn’t.
If he truly missed you, you’d know about it. You wouldn’t have to question it, because he’d be making his feelings very clear.
A man who misses you isn’t just reacting to the occasional IG story or striking up a conversation only to leave you hanging.
If his behaviour is inconsistent or unclear, it’s not you he misses, but rather what you could PROVIDE for him – an ego boost, validation, company when he’s bored etc.
It’s been months
In the first days and weeks after a breakup, it’s normal for both parties to miss one another and want to rekindle the relationship.
However, over time, those feelings dissipate and people generally tend to move on and stop yearning for their ex to come back.
If it’s been months (or even years!) since your breakup, and he’s reached out to tell you that he misses you, chances are he realises what he’s lost and is genuine about his feelings.
Will he miss me? | Final Thoughts
Breaking up with someone is never easy. Being broken up with is even harder.
It’s totally normal to miss your ex and wonder if they’re missing you as well.
As we’ve established in this article, they probably are!
However, in the great scheme of things, it really doesn’t matter whether he misses you.
At the end of the day, you broke up for a reason – because the relationship wasn’t working.
Perhaps your ex misses you being around, misses the familiarity of your relationship, or misses the way you made him feel, but ultimately, the two of you were not meant to be.
Even if the signs he misses you are all there, it doesn’t mean that he genuinely wants to get back together or that your relationship would work out better the second time around.
The best thing you can do is to go totally no-contact, at least until you don’t miss him anymore.
It won’t be easy, but it will get better, and after all, if it’s truly meant to be, it will be.
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